Assalamu'alaikum, dear readers! It's been almost 3 years since my last post and i hope you all are having a good time :)
Manythings happened during my hibernation, indeed, to me and you as well haha.
I was contracted as a lecturer on 1st February 2018 in an Science and Technology institute, but then leave several months after losing my first child.
I'm no longer a single and available woman since May 2016 (3 months after my last -previous- blog post) Alhamdulillah. The brave man came to my parent's house on Jan 16 (and that was our very first meeting, since i didn't know him before), and our family were making an agreement to held the wedding on May. Getting married to someone you freshly know, after only less than 5 times meeting (with family) is.. interesting, alhamdulillah.
Our first baby is a cute baby boy, passed away before being born -rahimahullah, Allah inshaAllah love him more- on Feb 17. The incident was a ver very... Aah i don't even know which word will be suutable to describe the condition and my feeling :'( i miss him, but i believe he is now living eternally happy with other child on the guard of Prophet Ibrahim 'alaihissalam, he is waiting me and my hubby there, in jannah in Sha Allah. Sometimes, be 'ikhlas' or sincerely accepting to what happened to me is easier than accepting people judgement. Yea.. During my losing moment, there are people who judge me that was wouldn't be happened if i was like this and like that.. Huft, none of a normal mom-to-be wants to lose the unborn child they are rearing all day and night for almost 9 months, and so do i. But... But.. :'(
His younger was born almost exactly one year after him, growing and developing fast into a loving cute 'gemes uwes uwes' baby. I pray to Allah my children will become a great muslim, aamiin. :)
Does marriage life give me happiness? Of course! Much happiness comes from much happy time.. Hehehehe
Does it difficult? Hmmm.. Yep, sometimes :) but nothing comes handy in life, all are need struggle and faith. Yep, faith to Allah that he gave the difficulty altogether with the solution. So, 'ala kulli hal, Alhamdulillah.
One difficult thing that i could barely handle to date is... People judgement through my condition, my feeling, or my doing. People around me is continuously saying this and that, things of these and those, which to be truth is hurting me.. More and more, day by day.. And i sincerely accept that some pieces of my self is now changing, from caring to non chalanting, from obeying to disrespecting, from loving to hating. I found my old version self was a firm woman but now, some part of me is sooo fragile.
Lucky me, Allah paired me with someone who trust me when they don't, support me when they mocked, remind me when i forget, and holding me to keep walk straight together to tge right path... His Jannah. Dear hubby, may Allah bless you :*
And.. Of course, i have Allah, The most of the most. And i know when i lost hope.. I need to meet Him, approching Him with Sholat and Du'a, keep my faith to Him, and I will save.
Manythings happened during my hibernation, indeed, to me and you as well haha.
I was contracted as a lecturer on 1st February 2018 in an Science and Technology institute, but then leave several months after losing my first child.
I'm no longer a single and available woman since May 2016 (3 months after my last -previous- blog post) Alhamdulillah. The brave man came to my parent's house on Jan 16 (and that was our very first meeting, since i didn't know him before), and our family were making an agreement to held the wedding on May. Getting married to someone you freshly know, after only less than 5 times meeting (with family) is.. interesting, alhamdulillah.
Our first baby is a cute baby boy, passed away before being born -rahimahullah, Allah inshaAllah love him more- on Feb 17. The incident was a ver very... Aah i don't even know which word will be suutable to describe the condition and my feeling :'( i miss him, but i believe he is now living eternally happy with other child on the guard of Prophet Ibrahim 'alaihissalam, he is waiting me and my hubby there, in jannah in Sha Allah. Sometimes, be 'ikhlas' or sincerely accepting to what happened to me is easier than accepting people judgement. Yea.. During my losing moment, there are people who judge me that was wouldn't be happened if i was like this and like that.. Huft, none of a normal mom-to-be wants to lose the unborn child they are rearing all day and night for almost 9 months, and so do i. But... But.. :'(
His younger was born almost exactly one year after him, growing and developing fast into a loving cute 'gemes uwes uwes' baby. I pray to Allah my children will become a great muslim, aamiin. :)
Does marriage life give me happiness? Of course! Much happiness comes from much happy time.. Hehehehe
Does it difficult? Hmmm.. Yep, sometimes :) but nothing comes handy in life, all are need struggle and faith. Yep, faith to Allah that he gave the difficulty altogether with the solution. So, 'ala kulli hal, Alhamdulillah.
One difficult thing that i could barely handle to date is... People judgement through my condition, my feeling, or my doing. People around me is continuously saying this and that, things of these and those, which to be truth is hurting me.. More and more, day by day.. And i sincerely accept that some pieces of my self is now changing, from caring to non chalanting, from obeying to disrespecting, from loving to hating. I found my old version self was a firm woman but now, some part of me is sooo fragile.
Lucky me, Allah paired me with someone who trust me when they don't, support me when they mocked, remind me when i forget, and holding me to keep walk straight together to tge right path... His Jannah. Dear hubby, may Allah bless you :*
And.. Of course, i have Allah, The most of the most. And i know when i lost hope.. I need to meet Him, approching Him with Sholat and Du'a, keep my faith to Him, and I will save.
